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Rapunzel
Rapunzel & Flynn vs Anna & Kristoff is the eighth installment of Princess Rap Battles. It features protagonists of Disney's Tangled, Rapunzel and Flynn Rider, battling side protagonists of Disney's Frozen, Anna and Kristoff. Cast Rappers *Whitney Avalon as Anna *James Maslow as Kristoff *Eliza Dushku as Rapunzel *Tom Lenk as Flynn Rider Cameos *Jim O'Heir as Santa Claus Lyrics Rapunzel My hair’s so soft, but I ball so hard, That my bed head brings all the boys to the yard! I was the caged bird singing, busting back on the scene, This little lost princess Is the long-locked queen Of Rap-Un-Zel! Right in my name! Coming back for my crown, with my magical mane! I’m a chef, guitarist, painter, potter, scholar, singer, dancer, Knock me, but like Elsa’s door, you haven’t got an answer! Your snowflake’s not unique and you’re past your peak, Even the silver in your hair Is a losing streak! I can’t believe how dumb you are Hans took you for a sucker, I’ll say it twice, you stink on ice. Did I mumble, motherfucker? Anna I’m not ANN-a, I’m AH-na, I go ham when I wanna! You can’t handle the drama, slam a damn prima donna! A once upon a timer I know better than momma, Frozen fever so hot, I have to chill in a sauna! Blondie’s only got three books and a mother that betrays her, And it doesn’t even phase her that she raised her with no razor! Sunflower in a tower, tricked by her kidnapper, Me? I woulda capped her and frickin’ witch slapped her! You’re not the brightest lantern and your mug is just fugly, The word on the street is that your duckling ain't snuggly! Agoraphobic bore and I don’t know what’s sadder: That you’ve never worn shoes or that you’re just a rope ladder! Flynn Rider I'm kinda like this oaf, but I'm dashing, smart and beautious, He's a bigger horse's ass than Maximus's gluteus! My dream came true: the girl, the castle, the money, I'm the wanted man she wanted, man, the future looks sunny! This dapper rogue rapper's now a royal insider, And since we got hitched we are both Flynn riders! You think you're hot shit? Well, your sister was colder, I'll melt the ice in your heart, when I heat up I smolder! Kristoff You're a fraud, Eugene, I'll pop your head like a twist off, This robber's getting clobbered when Kristoff gets pissed off! My reindeer, Sven, is so damn frosty, Santa's like: Damn! That's a cold-ass donkey! I love Anna, not her title, I would never two-time her, You're a terrible rhymer, a tower and social climber! You're a colossal debacle, even Olaf knows you're awful, You're as crooked as your nose, I should dust you like Gothel! Rapunzel & Flynn Can I end this business? Hells yes, I can, With the business end of my frying pan! Tied up and dangled, strung up and strangled, You'll have a brush with death when you're messing with Tangled! So hungry for a husband once you left your isolation, We saw you getting Hans-y at your sister's coronation, Snap engaged to a villain 'fore you cuddled up with Thor, Looks like any dude'll do when your love's an open door! This Arendelle airhead has a brain full of holes, From when her mind got wiped by those ridiculous trolls! Of course you Norses fight, but in the end you always lose, Your odds are sinking faster than your parents on a cruise! Anna & Kristoff You've got an avalanche of dandruff and lice by the million, You need a lake of shampoo and a full-body Brazilian! While we're on the subject, and I don't mean to push, But does your carpet match your drapes? That's like an 80-pound bush! I'm the fixer-upper lover who's as strong as an ox! I go hard all night long 'cause my family rocks! By the Northern Lights I keep her warm at night, And I'm moving more ice than Walter White! Can I say something crazy? Check how it affects ya? Your hair's a let down and no one respects ya! So get back in your prison atop that tall architecture! Won't be coming back for seconds because Anna wrecks ya! Poll Who Won? Rapunzel & Flynn Anna & Kristoff Trivia *This is the second battle to include people from the same fictional universe rapping against each other, after Freya vs Ravenna. **It is the fourth if Snow White vs Elsa and Cinderella vs Belle count, as Snow White, Elsa, Cinderella, and Belle are all seen as a part of the same universe in Wreck-it Ralph: Ralph Breaks the Internet.